Three Red Flags...
We have already communicated with you about the allegations against Mike Pilavachi. We've recently heard of allegations against Alan Scott - a Vineyard Pastor. In most cases pain and problems could have been prevented if people had acted earlier on smaller signs that something might be amiss. We want to flag up three "smaller things" - what we are calling red flags - that we think it will be helpful for us to be attentive to in order to keep our whole community healthy and safe.
Up front we want to say that life is ambiguous and applying any red flags will require wisdom on your part. We aren't saying these things are always sin or even asking you to apply rigid rules about them. Instead we are seeking to equip you to speak up when things don't seem quite right, and to give you a radar for what sorts of things these might be. Our doctrine of sin means we must presume some people will be accidentally or even deliberately doing things that are unhelpful and yet because of the grace we can all access in Jesus, we also know we can overcome evil with good, when we act with wisdom and compassion.
Here are three red flags:
People leaning on others to lend them money, especially when it seems that the person being asked would find it hard to say no, where there isn't a very obvious reason why the loan would be necessary, or where the same person seems to be repeatedly asking for loans. This relates to people pushing requests for money onto others.
People invading others personal spaces in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable, or which you think is making the recipient feel uncomfortable. This relates to inappropriate touch
People seeming to exert a significant amount of control over others such that they keep getting them to do what they want. Aligned to this would be someone regularly speaking to someone else in a way that seems to belittle them. This relates to misuse of power.
He's what we would want you to do when you see these Red Flags.
Don't just ignore it. Don't just act on it on your own but talk to a trusted leader about it. Don't keep false confidentiality but tell them all the details and together work out what to do about the situation. In nearly all cases we would want the action to involve at least a clarifying question to the person who seems to be doing it, to give them a chance to explain what they thought they were doing. That might be enough and you realise you misread the situation. But it might be necessary for you to explain why what they did was unhelpful. If done gently and clearly, this will hopefully resolve the issue at this point.
If you think more action might be required, or if there is a repeating pattern, or if you just think it wise to do so, we would want you to speak to Hannah or Lesley as part of the Safeguarding Team. They can talk you through next steps.
If you ever think a red flag hasn't been acted on sufficiently then you should always raise that to Dave Prothero or any other Trustee.
A quick explainer on the money one
On the issue of asking for money. We want to cultivate radical generosity and encourage everyone to generously give gifts to people in unexpected ways. But, as Paul explains in Galatians 6:2-5, this generous culture does not give individuals permission to lean on others to lend them money. There is a responsibility on everyone's part to provide for their own needs through working hard (1 Thess 4:11-12) and by cutting down on any spending that is above their income so they can care for their own (1 Tim 5:14-16). We believe the discipline of learning to do this is good for everyone and we should all encourage one another to learn it. If someone asks you to lend you money, you might be doing them a disservice by giving it to them.
This practice means we are then able to better help people who are in genuine need. We strongly recommend getting needy people to engage with Christians Against Poverty and the Citizens Advice Bureau. As a church we also have a widows and orphans fund and would always love to hear proposals for who we can bless with it. If after this people still feel they need a loan or you still want to lend them money please can we ask you to speak with your small group leader or one of the staff team first, so that there is some degree of accountability and safety in whatever arrangements are made. Often a gift of vouchers, that doesn't need to be repaid, can be a more straightforward way of helping someone who is in a tight spot.
We hope this approach to generosity will enable all of us to continue to grow in radical generosity, making Croydon Vineyard a safe and empowering place for all.
As always with these things, we would love to hear back from you about any questions or suggestions you have on it. Ultimately our goal is to equip you all with this stuff, so if anything isn't clear or doesn't seem right to you then it will be extremely helpful for all of us if you can help us make these things better.